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Househusband In-Training

ABOUT
My name is Ryne. Welcome to my world. Huge Real Housewives fanatic. Secretly married to Zayn Malik, Adam Lambert, and Michael Buble--all at the same time. Recently rekindled a childhood love for Mickey Mouse. Single. 21. Cancer. Gay. Wine snob. Kath-eter. Directioner. College graduate: English major, creative writing emphasis. The Golden Girls. Will & Grace. Macy's. Disney. Reality star in-training. If I were a Real Housewife, my opening tag line would be "Whoever said 'Money doesn't buy happiness' simply didn't try hard enough."

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I think it’s time for a “Who Wore It Best?: Real Housewives edition.”

Kim Zolciak-Biermann (left) wore the look to the season 5 ATL reunion while Melissa Gorga wore the same look to the 2013 Bravo Upfronts yesterday.

So…who wore it best?

You guys. Melissa Gorga retweeted me. Melissa Gorga. Retweeted. Me. I can’t. I just. I need a moment. I’m unable to can at the moment.

You guys. Melissa Gorga retweeted me. Melissa Gorga. Retweeted. Me. I can’t. I just. I need a moment. I’m unable to can at the moment.


Merry Christmas from the Gorga family!

Merry Christmas from the Gorga family!

If you’re going to steal someone else’s .GIF and claim it as your own, at least know who the person is! It’s Melissa Gorga, not Melissa Gudice. And it’s spelled Giudice anyway…

If you’re going to steal someone else’s .GIF and claim it as your own, at least know who the person is! It’s Melissa Gorga, not Melissa Gudice. And it’s spelled Giudice anyway…

Actually, Tre, verse 2 of “I Just Wanna” is about you.

I saw you size me up when I walked in the clubLike who does she, who does she, she think she is?Trying to fuel the drama, but I know best cuz MamaTold me if I have nothing nice to say to sayShhhh.Yea baby call me rubber.And I’ll just call you glue.Now put your hand over your mouth so that it sticks to you.You keep your mouth shut.Wanna strut in dangerous.Because your silence is golden and I can’t wait for the rush. 

Actually, Tre, verse 2 of “I Just Wanna” is about you.

I saw you size me up when I walked in the club
Like who does she, who does she, she think she is?
Trying to fuel the drama, but I know best cuz Mama
Told me if I have nothing nice to say to say
Shhhh.
Yea baby call me rubber.
And I’ll just call you glue.
Now put your hand over your mouth so that it sticks to you.
You keep your mouth shut.
Wanna strut in dangerous.
Because your silence is golden and I can’t wait for the rush. 

Can’t tell if I like “Rockstar” or this one better.

The album art for Melissa Goraga’s next single, “I Just Wanna,” being released September 9!

The album art for Melissa Goraga’s next single, “I Just Wanna,” being released September 9!

This whole graphic thing was like the best ever.

This whole graphic thing was like the best ever.

Melissa’s got a point. The show should just be renamed to “Teresa and the Enemies” or “The Teresa Giudice Hour.” “The Real Enemies of Teresa Giudice” has a nice ring to it.

Melissa’s got a point. The show should just be renamed to “Teresa and the Enemies” or “The Teresa Giudice Hour.” “The Real Enemies of Teresa Giudice” has a nice ring to it.